In this webinar find out more about coaching and mentoring.
Lo Onda. Welcome to the last off four modules in a series on career development. Leadership skills for lawyers. In this model, we will look at coaching a mental ring and how they can help with you and your organization. We will define and explain both coaching arm answering on the differences between them. Explore how we can help you and your team achieve your goals on. We look at introducing coaching and mentoring to your workplace, both formally and informally. So the underlying message I'm in this weapon are will be. Why go it alone when you can have help? And as you may have seen on the Internet account, it's an African problem. Have it? It's gonna make sense. And it says, If you want to go quickly, go alone. If you want to go far, go together. One of the differences that having a coach and mental make, but there certainly different styles of leadership. O r. Coaching also that you can apply two different situations. So let's look at, firstly at what coaching is. You don't have to go far, but like leadership, you have to go too far to find a definition. But for this model. Rather than turning Teoh the Great and the good for their definition. I'd like to share with you what it means to me on why I am such a big believer in the benefits of coaching. So what I think happens when you have a coach is that you have someone to listen to you, to get beneath the surface of what you're saying under what's actually happening, to offer, supported challenge and to Gangjee through the process of exploring, committing to and implementing practical solutions. What they very much do not aim is provide you with the answers, although I and many colleagues might package of services is perhaps coach, mental or coach mentor advisor, so that when working in the field, we know I'm with permission. We might fulfill a different hats. But when defining coaching in its purest sense, at least may it's collaborative rather than directive. It's about the Coach e making their own decisions rather than being told what to do because it's very much founded in the belief that that Coach e. The benefit of the coaching will produce the best answers for their solutions. But they're having one foisted upon them on Day one when I was most of our situation. So what the coach is doing is helping them reach the optimal solution on all of those features being listened. Teoh having questions put to you having somebody look beneath the surface, they're all actually much greater value than you might think at first instance for May in particular, at the most surprising thing is often how solution appears as soon as an individual voices that problem out loud. It might not be the final off vast solution, but it is very much made me aware. But we do ourselves no favours by keeping things inside, even if we think we're giving some top quality thoughts and analysis to that problem. The reality is that for many, there's have been really significant about articulating that out loud. It seems to get them a full of shape somehow are very much linked with that. The quality of the listening that we have to do is coaches benefit that could cheese get from that has made me very aware how rarely we live to get a space to talk, and we listen to just think about it. When did you last have an hour with anyone. He was hoping to meet you. The entire focus of that conversation it's there is that really does have the power to bring about change. Perhaps there's something about the way we live our lives day today. That's something that simple could make a difference. House. We live those lives without that quality of connection that was probably outside the scope of this weapon out on buying them. The definition. A key point is that Coach does not have to work in our know your field because we've seen a heart of what they dio is a belief that you find in your own solutions with them as a guide. So that's how it works with an external coach. But many of those benefits also apply. When you have leaders within your organization who adopts a coaching style for you as long as I'm leaders or at the very least, potential leaders, because I think we're all potential leaders internally, it's perhaps best to think about coaching within your organization is being a mindset. Are you under this, leading from a position where you have belief in the power of others to find their own solutions, you want to support those of us to grow rather than remaining or finding yourself in a position. Whether dependent on you. You want others to be challenged. Challenge perhaps coming from you so that they can achieve their full potential. And you're coming from a place where you're generally genuinely interested in what we have to say rather than go through the motions, letting them vents and imposing your own thoughts on them. How does it look in practice, what that skills you'll need And if we talk about coaching somebody or having your coaching conversation with them? What we used the main is that we will skilled questions more on that. Later, we will listen to the answers allowing space and silence brother and intervening ourselves or rephrasing the question to make it easier because they seem to be that stuck did the mouth Silence is one of the most surprising things about an effective coaching session is very much not a session about the coaches voice. They will provide feedback on Lance's being careful not to give their own answers honest, that's been agreed on your doctor, this approach of being on a spectrum of coach, mentor, advisor and then you go through that process again, you repeat is necessary. Sometimes following a strict coaching model, which will take you through specific stages in turn, would always worked on the basis that is the co cheese agenda, not the coaches that they should direct by. That conversation goes so that even if you're applying a model, you should have the ability and the willingness to reflex for and some tests would add in an extra stage there, which is that to go through those phases effectively and to get results. That needs to be trust on report between the two individuals. And I do see that almost is a given as another line, no rubbing something you need to establish each time. There are also theories which again have seen used with great results, which would argue that sometimes the conversation needs to be uncomfortable, that the challenges needs to be very robust on occasions and that you need sometimes as a coach to shake things up. It's available to allow the other person to move on, But even then, perhaps paradoxically, you can't really achieve that successfully. Unless you have report in the first place, we'll come back to those features. The question in the listening, the feedback on the challenge. But let's look first at how that differs from entering on what mentoring is. So here I will turn to a couple of official or learned definitions and then give you my own. Andi from the European at Mentoring and Coaching Council. Very tell us that Mental Ring is a developed, developed man little process in which a more experienced person shares their knowledge with a less experienced person in a specific context through a series of conversations. Occasionally, Mental Ring can also be a learning partnership between pairs and then Julie Star was written fantastic books and was a great website on coaching and mentoring. It says this that mentoring is a distinct relationship where one person, the mental, supports the learning development on progress of another person. The Manti, a mental, provide support by offering information, advice, assistance in a way that empowers the mentee on taking from bows and different definitions. I have reached my own definition of mannitol ring, which is a relationship short or long term, usually between two people where person A has more or different experience and knowledge than person bait today, it's willing to help person B to learn Person B is willing to accept that help person A is willing and able person be have control over their learning. On most of that, learning comes about three conversation. So when we look at the difference between coaching and mental thing, the big difference for May is the value of the mental walls. Knowledge they will usually work in the same field is the Monte, although not always insulin company. And it's recognised within that mentoring relationship that the knowledge and experience of the mantle is something of value that it can add to the men's. He's learning. No, that's really something to be passed on. Whole fail. Nothing is that straightforward. Obviously, times change, but that there was knowledge and experience that, and it's helpful, I think, to recall where the word comes from comes from Greek mythology. Ever mental, he was a friend of Odysseus, was left to watch over but the disease, his palace on his son. When Odysseus left the treasure more so. In that sense, mental was becoming something of a father figure and advise a wise elder, however, rather than the mental simply telling them anti everything they know. I prefer to see. The relationship has been similar to coaching in that to improve the quality of learning and too in bad. But learning the mental would usually be asking a stupid questions and alone time for the Monte to find their own solution. But as distinct from coaching, they will, where appropriate, share their view on the best way forward based on their knowledge and experience. Also, a mentoring relationship like a coaching later ship might be for a specific task or time, with a coach or mental being king of over to compensate on them. It's allow independents to flourish, but in practical terms a mentoring relationship. If it's a good quality one, I'm benefits both sides can last like time. So many of the cool skills overlap and I mentioned above. Sometimes one person could do both. If I clear about one, they're swapping that house. We look at those coat cost girls in more detail soon, but firstly, let's address a misconception Michael across. But both coaching and mentoring occasionally, sometimes in traditional barristers changes that I've alluded to earlier. But in other organizations also, I made a suggestion or the full that people don't need mental ALS or the good people a mental, but that qualified professionals who can manage their own careers make their own decisions. There's a view in some quarters that needing a mental might be seen as a sign of weakness. And similarly, in the past, there's been a tendency in the UK and within solicitors firms in the UK Also to see coaching has been a tool for correction or performance management rather than a positive, proactive step to bring out people's treat potential. So I share with you, as I showed with those clients. Some of the famous figures you have given credit to their mantles as Steve Jobs mental with Mark Zuckerberg number. If it ends with Bill Gates, that's the Freddie Laker mental Richard Branson. We're going back a bit now, but I think the point being that if Richard Branson can use a man sort and so can you, Mr Indio, mentally tomorrow. And that's before we get to Mr Miyagi and Daniel in the Karate Cares Bottom Bordeaux on Harry Potter if you need to, you can think about the celebrity mentors in X factor and the voice on their interesting, too. I mean, welcome to the definition because they walk that line between giving the benefit of their knowledge and experience and allowing the contestants free rein to express themselves. Coaches tend not quite as much public credit. UM, looks to name a few. I have only seen pictures off Joe Wicks, the body coach, with his coach and awards ceremony. Oprah Winfrey has previously given credit to her coach, as have actors such as rain out a couple of Hugh Jackman President Bill Clinton on. But there are instances of sport people crediting nonsporting coaches and trainers. But other individuals. Serena Williams is one such example. And if you went into any of the large Corporates, you could think off perhaps the world's run by Mr Zuckerberg. And so you would see a culture where coaching both external and internal isra team it's a positive, not a negative. And I believe we will get to that point in the UK as more people experience coaching my perhaps looking a little bit behind both in the UK and in the law. Alternative. Some of the benefits of scene when coaching mentor and have been embraced, which includes clear goal setting, Taking the time out to do that, a swell accountability for achieving those goals on. I have seen people who have Bean perhaps thinking about it for a long time through coaching, go on to meet the targets of addressing the international board of the company for the first time off tackling a difficult issue in a senior leadership team. Eating or making successful job application applications for judicial appointments. And similar, I've seen lawyers in firms on an independent practice make quicker progression, some more complex cases, getting clarity around accurate direction and then working what matters to them, whether it's improved time management, improve work, life balance, increased confidence. Oh, better cohesion within the team. And let's not forget about the benefits. In the other direction, metals often speak about the fulfillment they get from entering others. I've seen those results. Considerations in that person blossom and often emerges that the mentors have learned almost as much as the nineties. Indeed, many organizations have a reverse mentor in scheming place where new graduates mental more senior executives, particularly around issues such as tech or diversity and inclusion as a manager, perhaps adopting a coaching style or getting coaches for your staff in much in the potential, you could unleash the capacity you could free up in your own diary if you enabled your team to find their own solutions rather than having them having on your everywhere. It was also off the culture shift. But states place when coaching a mental wringer introduced People quickly become capable of self coaching and pay to peer coaching. They prove their listening skills, and they have more time to really care about the people, which has all sorts of part positive benefits for what you're trying to achieve. So how can you get some of those benefits for you or your organization as a rather simplistic split? I think they're probably more or less three ways to think about introducing these benefits. You could have a specific coaching program where a specified qualified coach works with an individual and perhaps also with a great 14 requires thoughts on a budget and care to implements. But it has the benefit of being structured and defined, and it should be arranged so that you could monitor and measure results, the coach coach ease it should have in place a contract. No commercial comes throughout the terms and conditions of payments. I'm not just a commercial contract. Also contract between the two, which sets out that reigns individual responsibilities and ethical considerations it should cover. She's such as confidential thing. You would want the coaching conversations to be confidential, but the external coach would also want to have to take into account the organization's needs that pain the bell alongside the needs of the individual. Sometimes I tricky ethical line just to give one example what the organization is paying for coaching but the coach. He wants to use all the sessions to apply for a job. Todo think about applying for a job in a different organization to get ready to do so. In those cases, the coach should have a contract in place, which allows the me that I brought that topic or to go back to the organization in certain circumstances so that they are not taking money under false pretences. You can also have a formal system of venturing Utkan again. Get outside help with that or you constructor insulin lane, and by formal structure, I mean a man sort of anti being matched a green how their work together. How about female meats? What specific learning their relationship is intended supports how the relationship will be monitored, where it will end, and so we'll talk a little bit more about putting in place. A scheme like that was the end of this module. 0/3 way, perhaps, is a starting point. You, under the leaders can begin to develop a coaching style of leadership within the organization. Well, he does adopt some of the coaches tools to support that team members to learn and to grow. And there's nothing overlap with some informal mentoring or changing of hats to offer some wisdom at carefully chosen points. So let's look at that arrangement and explore some of the skills of the coach of the mental that you might be able to add to your leadership to Okay, we've seen that one of the key skills is to ask questions to find the other person's answers rather than waiting in with your room. So your aim here is to ask intelligence and open questions, the kind that we turned not to ask or answer on a daily basis. What's going on here? What's in your mind is that something will be useful for us to explore today. You can use those types of questions to ascertain clearly what the scenario is, what individual needs help with. You've been listening to Janice's. You'll be listening until they've really finished. But you then might be going on to further questions such as, Can you say a bit more about that? Is there more to say here, rather than just accepting that first answer? And that's where it helps to be a lawyer as well as a coach, you're already probably ahead of the game and not accepting the first answer you're given we might use similar techniques were trying to two solutions from Arco. Cheese here often helps to have a phase where those potential solutions are unfettered, bright practicalities, time money. So as, for example, water all the possible solutions rather than leaping straight to What do you think the answer is? You can then help the coach. He whittled down no solutions by exploring some of the things we talked about in the module on career pathways and goal setting, your reign being too for both parties and sure full understanding of the situation. Natural inability to exploit current resource is past successes past learning to explore possible solutions and or potential obstacles. It's arrived at some on your specific aim being to refrain from offering solutions or direction unless you're in a position to do so on, have deemed appropriate to dull your mental hat so all of that might relates or proactive once a one on attempt to make progress or address the specific issue. But you can also think about adjusting your response today. Today enquiries and questions so that when a team member comes to you with what do you think I should do about X? Can you re train yourself so that Rob had been producing the answer straightaway? U. N stands go back with, But what do you think? Answer is as well as retraining yourself. You will be retraining your team, perhaps subtly, to think for themselves. Indeed, once a list writers working with recently told me that her supervisor had a policy that his stuff could come and ask him anything any time. But he would only stop and help them if they had also thought about and brought along. Brought with them to that conversation. Two possible solutions themselves might be something to think about. Of course. Be sensible. Back to the other analogies who thought about elsewhere. Deadlines will usually take precedence as well, avoiding a professional negligence case on getting people safely out of the building in an emergency. But you will find that for most questions you arrest, you can allow time and space to that individual to find their own solution. A further scale, which is valuable for both the coach and the mental, formal and informal, is listening. I've already spoke about the menace value on human scarcity, of having time to be hurt. We live busy lives. I'm recently right with somebody who said I always now halfway through, but it is they want to say, and I know what else is there. It's so I just jump in saves time. I don't think he's on his own, unfortunately, and he is working on it. And no doubt it does save some time. But only in the short sen because of what it leads to in the long term is frustration with that moment and perhaps the very expensive issue off. Failing to retain staff and needing to recruit on retrain you might also want to pause for a second and think about how arrogant it is to think that what you have to say is more important than what the person in front of you has to say. You can't possibly be right all of the time. Think of the ideas and the creativity has been lost simply to save some time in the short term. So developed the listening habit. Let people finish what we're saying and then pause for a few extra Bates in case there's anything else to come, then maybe ask if there's anything else to come. If appropriate, check that ive understood what it said. You only need some witness a limited amount of cross examination in the courts to understand how easy is to hear what you want to hear rather than what was actually said or asked. It's not even always deliver. If you're not problems standing the person in front of you that really does waste time and can lead to ongoing miscommunication. So save that time by making those checks and finally, on the court transferrable skills for leaders, potential leaders being coaches and mental zin their day jobs, providing feedback on what you've heard in this context, I don't mean that which we've discussed your the weapon, ask corrective suggestion or praise. What I mean is much more akin to the summarizing that we've talked about in the listening section. Same back to them what you've heard, sometimes just to simply that, because again, almost unbelievably, this can provide magical results. You say back to them what I just said. That's what they like. Book goes on. They realize something. Maybe they're what, like search makes no sense that person, the next floor doesn't hate them. Or maybe that the way forward is obvious. Who they need to speak to becomes obvious, or they suddenly see what they've been doing wrong. What misinterpreted the list goes all some people get this just by saying things that allowed the value of questions. Sometimes they need to hear it back. Andi feedback in his contacts could go further, especially if you're in an on going coaching relationship with this person. This is one of those instances where you need the report what might need to move into uncomfortable territory. What I'm talking about here is something along the lines of Best's on our last through coaching sessions. You said that you go to speak to Axe about why you haven't done it s You blame time commitments, but that doesn't seem realistic every three month period. What's really stopping in now? I'm not necessarily advocating that wording. It's just to give you an example of how so, if you might need to pay on. I've certainly been list off until for in the past, where it benefits the client. It makes me laugh when people compare professional coaching in the workplace to life coaching sometimes because really life coach enough and again, sometimes wrong Leg has quite a fluffy reputation. Coach in the workplace doesn't have today, and I don't think should be fluffy. I think it has a real purpose on giving. That's a big feedback ties in very much with the accountability function, particularly coach. And I think those benefits probably obvious if you haven't had the benefit of somebody calling you out. Somebody calling into question your failure to follow three with plans cause for a minute and think about what difference it could have made to achieving your goals and fulfilling your potential. So those are some tools which you cannot see a kit, But if you wanted to go ahead and introduce a more formal scheme, let let's she's example of mentoring here. If you want to get some or all of your staff, the ability to have a mental, here's some things to think about to avoid what I think is the most common pitfall, which is having a scheme that exists in name only, that people are paired up. But then nothing really happens and you can see on the slide some other things that might go wrong very much linked to that really not meeting up meeting aimlessly just there. No chance it about the Weber. A lack of honesty so you can't really move forward. Lack of feedback. Reluctance to to be honest with each other about how the mens willing could work better for them. A lack of reflection. So perhaps the same things keep going wrong. Sometimes a mantles ego get in the way. They see this is an opportunity to meet up for coffee on tell small war stories. Sometimes mentees don't adopt or aren't given sufficient responsibility. Remember, from our definitions, we're trying still to empower rather than simply to instruct. Now I believe that you can avoid most of those difficulties by full of ring. Well, I would say simple step. It's simple to stay. It needs some thought, needs some work on that I simply to set boundaries and expectations and start as an organization. You need to do that for the scheme, what the boundaries and expectations for that scheme. But you also need to make sure that within each mentoring relationship, parties do the same for themselves. You're wants caught with your own ideas for this, I'm sure. But here are some ideas that the things that should be spoken about and agreed on before that mental relationship starts. If it is to have the best possible chance of success, you'll see and that there's income obtained there on purpose and commitment and responsibility. So why is now a good time for this mentoring relationship? What does the men's he wants to achieve? Are they perhaps new? Is a a a support for the 1st 6 months in the organization, or are they perhaps approaching a promotion? Why and how and indeed is the mental able to help? Do they have the relevant knowledge, experience and commitment to facilitate learning rather than instructing. How will the two of you were together? And do you see it, for example, is a relationship where you can phone at three in the morning where, as they say, it is a relationship where you meet up for half an hour every month. What's the purpose? Isn't limited in time. Ongoing. How fickle it will you meet? Um, how can you change that? Will it be face to face? They're in a different formats. Can we just pick up the phone if it's not free in the morning? I imagine. What are the rules on confidentiality? Particular Important? If you're in an organization on what would the Manti T before accession at the only should be on them in my deeds? Prepare if fans to ensure that the session has a clear purpose. Perhaps it now goes without saying, but ideally, they should be ongoing feedback and reflection on both sides to ensure that the relationship is successful and maintains its purpose. So if include a couple of slides here just to assist you with that, I won't say too much extra about them for time reasons. But you can see here on this reflection slides that there are a number of questions each individual can ask themselves after the session. What went well, what went badly. But the idea is that we are reflecting almost together and that we are showing we're doing it together or we're sharing those answers. And then, if we may want the feedback slide, think about how this will happen. It's too easy to decide. That's very much. That was brilliant, much harder to both. Be honest about what's working and what isn't. Can you both safely back as a positive, even if it feels negative? Can you see it as a learning opportunity? Somewhat bizarrely, I found the FBI's mentor agreement online, and it's very formal. It's very structured on that includes this question. Can you? I agree that you will periodically discuss our process relationship and take steps to enhance and develop it wise words to finish a couple of slides, Uh, for Mantel's oh, essential lentils. Things to consider. Before you take on this responsibility, you wouldn't want to do it just to tick a box. Ask yourself if you have time. You have the scale to challenge stretch and guide. Come on some points on that in a second. Are you willing to learn as well as ensuring that the other person is you? Show enthusiasm, openness and honesty on you, willing and open to encourage, supports, empathize and celebrate successes Now turned some of those points is into a flow charts, which might help keep you on track. Thinking that clarity at the outset on both sides checking that your facilitating usually check that you were given the Monte the credit for their resources show that you were genetically and the last one that often gets forgotten. If you do find yourself in a mentoring relationship, which becomes, ah, burden to you either because you're so keen to do it well or because some very difficult issues of the risen is there somewhere that you honored indeed, them antique and go to get help, perhaps even somebody to me day if need bay, perhaps a source within your organization, as all the resource is, we sometimes see, for example, situation where somebody has started a mentoring relationship. But what the mentee finds that you need Israeli something more akin to counseling or therapy. Have you got enough support to redirect them in their circumstances. And then some thoughts on how Teoh adopt this facility tive approach rather falling into traditional teaching or telling I grew. That meant he should drive. The agenda should come, perhaps give you notice also, uh, but they should come ready to discuss something so time is not wasted. But it's their responsibility to learn that progress to do the actions Teoh practice. And so these tips really around not getting too involved, letting them make their own mistakes sometime accepting that the what they choose to dio is outside your control and you don't need to fix everything as well as their being a responsibility on, then make return to the next slide. We can see that you also can think about what this person needs to know. It was that concept that they might not know what they don't know. How can you best help them learn? Do you have some stories that might help But remember, Nisman applies focus on getting real clarity around what they want in general. Go to them first to see what the solution is. And if you've decided to share, don't give them everything you know about the subject of long ago make it useful by isil rising, he thought, The key principles. Remember that all the time you're doing. That's your building, your own skills. So a bit of a whistle stop tour there about introducing a mentoring scheme just to finish off that section. You'll need to out to that, I'm sure, by creating forms created a process for much ing and so on. But this should start you off if I something you want to implement in your organization. So our concludes. But this module on the theories on with a quote, your betters quote that Benjamin Franklin tell May and I forget teach me and I may remember involved May on. I learned on with that. So I wish you look in developing a learning on growth culture with in your team's on within your organizations.
39:07
