The Senior Negotiator

Hello and welcome to you listening online to this datable program for the Senior Negotiator. My name is Mack Makai, and I work for D'Antoni Limited, where Marketing, training, consultancy and management as well as marketing on I look after the legal division. W L A W on, uh, my job here is to take you through. Some of the key points for Senior Negotiate is now three days. LOL. We provided longer programs. We provided a short program keynote program for The Persuasive Negotiator. Looking at some interpersonal skills, this raises the game a little bit about the process of negotiation is not about the tools and techniques within that. It's about looking at negotiation from a number of different points of view. So what are we aiming to do? Well, by the end of this program, there's nothing you could do. One is to understand, define your negotiating strategy, knowing what your approach will be to negotiations. It's not to say that it becomes set in tablets of stone, but becomes something that you can apply in different situations. On recognizing that there are different approaches to negotiation, depending on when and where you are, we'll explore that for a number of points of view. Emotion Intelligence raises the game for senior negotiators to understand how we can use this to understand the other party, which I think is quite important. But then, of course, the looking personality traits. It's not a psychology lesson dealing an opportunity to explore a number of different points of view. When you're giving the other party as well as your own organization, of course, we will look at dirty tricks. I shall be going through them in very fine detail. Is the keynote program backed up by work? Because they always are? There's more information in there that will help give you a better view on key elements of it. But this, I hope, will give you a few reminders of the larger program or indeed give you some impetus to come and have a look at the program in more detail. When you've got more time. So what's it all about? Well, what this is about is a little bit of theory to put into practice. That's the underlying part off this little, very much hands on, as the illustration suggests, so it will be looking at the moon. Now you learn the moves ingests very, very quickly is fairly straightforward. But it's not just knowing the moves. It's how you use them, the pragmatic approach to that. So we'll share some tools and ideas like emotion intelligence, for example. But it's the practical application that on that often requires a bit of practice in my experience running negotiating skills programs both here in the UK, in the Middle East and elsewhere. It's actually very much about hands on experience off using those to embed the learning. And if you wish to explore that, of course, please talk today to law about an in house solution here in the UK, and we can help people with that better practices at negotiations. So with that in mind and and thank you for datable for giving us the opportunity to explore the subject a bit more detail, let's remember that negotiation is to be defined here as the art of seeking agreement to the maximum advantage of all concerned now, immediately reading that you think will hang on a minute. That isn't quite the way I perceive negotiation to be what you mean maximum advantage while you want to give them everything that they want. That is not Maxim advantage. Well, a give negotiation. If you want an agreement to be signed by both parties, that doesn't have to go to mediation or the courts by amazing. That's an option, then that may be a new approach you take, and that's not what I'm talking about here. What I'm talking about is when a deal is signed, the other party must agree that that's the maximum advantage for them at that time. So Maximum Voltage doesn't in. This context means everything for them. But as far as they feel, it is a good deal. Maybe that they by signing that deal, they won't lose as much as they might by not signing that deal. Maybe they do gain a lot of people in negotiations, talk about a win win situation. Well, my experience of being involved in sports, then when two sides both want to win, then inevitably that leads to conflict. And if somebody feels that they're using, they may go bend the rules a little bit, so we don't want to explore that. From that point of view, it's about mutual gain. I'm gonna get. Everything I want is enough negotiations just demand and I get everything I want. But I may recognize negotiation art of seeking agreement so that they get what they feel is the best they can gain for that moment and gain. I gained a lot that I want. I have to give up some things and I maximize my gain. Maximum advantage keeps a bit more off balance, and that's what a negotiation is that trade and exchange and then, therefore that helps with strategy. So I hope that considered a little bit into context, more notes in the what book that accompany the program. But one has negotiation and well, I think the science or art for negotiation or both valid because science and negotiation is about the facts, the figures, the information precedence and so on and so forth, whereas the art of negotiation is about people being to read people and understand people. Now I can't go through all the facts of negotiation because every detail is going to be different. What I can talk about is the art of negotiation on that's about people. But that's really what I want explore with this program. So let's start by thinking through what our approach negotiations might be. Can you establish what that might be for your firm? Now, when we do negotiate with other suppliers on behalf of our clients, we have very clear approach is that we'll try and get the best price for a client. So if we run an exhibition for you because you want to do an exhibition, law, society or association person injury, lawyers, something like that, we organized those sort of exhibitions on behalf affirms we will buy the best price we can't. But what we do not do is to put a mark up on that. So we were buying exhibition stand and it would normally cost, I don't know, maybe £1000 get it for 950. Well, we will and pass it on to you because we don't want to make money out of what we deal on your behalf. Our negotiation strategy is about our expertise in the ideas that we've got in management and in marketing, not about being by hospitality chairs for your exhibition or something like that, and pass on profit. That's our approach to negotiate coming. So we have a strategy from that. Of course, one could look a personal style in a number of points of view. There's more information, of course, in workbook, but we can look bearing degrees off. Approach may be very active to a negotiation. Could be very passive to negotiations continued between two Onda. We may be pushing our own agenda or we may be juicy. Well, let's see what we can collaborate here, Cooperate in some sort of way. Now, with those dimensions on what could use this to say? Well, okay, what approach do you want to take? It depends on the situation. Clearly you may want if you are litigator, you may choose on behalf of your time firm to be competitive on very active, little aggressive and so forth. But you may choose and you say, Well, okay, I do want to push for a particular advantage, but I'm quite flexible to hear what they've got to say. It may be that I can find something that's going to be in my benefit. It's slightly different approach now. It may be that you're on the on the defensive. You made that force. If I won't be flexible or would be cooperative, I'm sure of what the outcome might be, they may be able to offer me something happening. Thought off off something like I may find more interesting than I might otherwise. I thought that I would be operating in that way. I think generally, and I would say this myself. Is it in negotiations? I would tend to be active on a political to look out what's going on. But I would tend if it is a negotiation, to be cooperative towards a mutual gain game, because I want lasting relationships with people over time. Which is why, in a very fortunate 25 years, to have maintained client relationships over a long period of time, so am I aiming for a one off that different negotiation. If it's a continuum with people over time, then that will be slightly different. There's options, and that's really what the analysis is all about, of course, when it comes to style back in the day, then personality was assumed to be off particular types, the kal Eric here, or battle aggressive and so forth for sanguine, the more relaxed the blood sanguine and from Latin, of course, love positive, melancholic would be analytical, sad and thoughtful on phlegmatic, maybe defensive eso. So far, this humors old man. Well, that's a very old view of psychology, and I'm not a psychologist or know the subject is very fascinating. I think personality style is something else. It's worth exploring. That's the degree to which we may exhibit our emotions or control our emotions. So I've seen you. Negotiation, training people have been seniors, listeners who have actually used aggressive emotions quite a bit on. That's an interesting approach that they take on, one that I find by controlling my I could unpick in a role play quite easily. Likewise, there's things that we may tell these things that we may ask on. It depends on your strategy or approach to negotiations where you want to keep talking, to tell people what's important. But I feel personally that asking questions is often a lot more powerful, so again dimension, some way of analyzing it. And this is another tool for you to explore what's going on. So telling people what your needs are being emotional about it. Very expressive approach, a little bit more information in the workbook. Of course, it may be that you are controlling your emotions, but telling people what you want and therefore driving things forward. The asking is analytical. So why do you feel that? What way would that be? Helpful? How would your boss feel about this? How would your client, this bomb toe that I, under particular pressure controlling emotions myself but asking the questions to explore more information? And then, of course, the well it's working with people internally. Gonna have a good relationship with people that I will demonstrate a more able on, use my styles in different ways again, something worth exploring in order to be able to negotiate more successfully. Of course, when we come to negotiation, I do recognize that there's different times to negotiate. Just gonna go through this fairly quickly. It's not relevant to everybody all the time, but certainly in commercial situation certainly contracts that it is something worth exploring intellectual bag. Then you can explore this in a bit more detail. So the time to negotiate, maybe when a specifications four contract being put up, you negotiate, whom specifies what's needed for the contract on. I've been involved in looking at training programs we've developed on behalf of clients and used justification to decide well, what's actually going to be involved now? Maybe it's making sure that one gets on the preferred supply. A list price of that engagement needs, wants desires. The common interest of customers, suppliers specifies, becomes very important and something we looked at. It can be that once the tenders established, then how it's delivered. We've been involved in public sector tenders involved in universities. We've been involved in a number of from public sector organizations, and post tended negotiations are often something that happens there in order to the demonstrating were able to do the work. But now we're all about delivering. So there may be some post tender negotiations in construction, not my area. But there are, of course, post contract negotiations about livable, about contingencies and so forth and completion contract. The number of things have to happen at that stage again. If that is your commercial world, then you'll be very familiar those different stages off negotiation. But I'd like to explore a little bit more detail of this subject called emotional intelligence. So let's turn on, have a look at using E. I in negotiations that I think is something that raises your game. If you're senior negotiator and something I found really quite interesting comes up in communication techniques generally, and it's very much about the the art off negotiation people in negotiations. So what is it all about? Well, emotional intelligence comes from a book but has been prepared by Daniel Goldman in the late nineties. Early two thousands on was looking at a variety of different areas about the degree to which people can relate to others. Emotion intelligence is different from I. Q. Your intelligence quotient has to do with a variety of different intelligences on. Many would argue that you're born with those intelligences, and indeed, you could get better at using numbers that may have a modest effect on your new miracle ability. But when it comes to emotion intelligence, this is something that we gained through life experiences and indeed can learn on the negotiating courses. The long versions that we put on with data law will explore them in more detail, but for here we can have a quick overview, so emotion intelligence is integrated with your aware of your own emotions, your own angers, your own tiredness, your own frustrations and so on and so forth and be able to modify and deal with those emotion. Intelligence has to do with your regulation off your motivations, your regulation off yourself, particularly in a negotiation. And then, if you are able to do that, then you're able to self motivate to behave in a different way, control one behavior in a particular way. So awareness regulation of motivation on the next two. Added to that are the abilities to relate to other people is empathy and sympathy and those understandings of social skills that there on being able to relate to what other people doing, being conscious of what they are going through and so forth conscious doesn't mean the same as accepting it doesn't mean the same as validating it necessarily, but at least being able to deal. That is, of course, very important. So a few other things to think about when it comes to negotiations. There's two types of negotiations in broad terms is the degree to which you are claiming value. There's a finite of value to hand between the parties on how much of it can you get a possible for your side? Well, that's fine. If you are a litigator and quite right, too. If you are representing the agree party or indeed defendant so forth, getting as much as you can, all losing the least that you can, that is common eventuality. But in other negotiations where what we're trying to do is to maximize advantage to or concern is to look at ways in which there are things that will create value between, so the sum of the parts is greater than the components within it on. That is really where emotion intelligence is coming a very, very powerful when negotiating, the staff negotiate with suppliers, negotiating with other entities in mergers and acquisitions and so forth. So quite a lot to be had within that, there's a lot of ways of testing, emotion, intelligence. We do test it within the materials that are in the long program with data law. There's a number of different approaches. One you can do is to self report on what you think you are or what you do. The danger of that, of course, is that depends on your, like most skill sets your ability tested in some way, and that has its limitations. It may be that others will give you some feedback 3 60 feet back is a very powerful tool. I know many firms using that, but then you need be aware of who you are asking about you on the degree to which they know you understand something briefed up ourselves with the loss of 36 degree feedback. We've done this and police forces public sector ventured earlier on and so forth and over on to our interviews with dozens of 75 to be exact senior officers in a particular police force on looking at the 3 60 degree feedback that give on people's performance with in the workplace ability tests. Of course, you need to have the right test of the right skills on then. How well is that actually being constructed doesn't actually evaluate what it is you're trying to achieve. Let's turn, though, to look at AI in the workplace, because I think that is really what it's all without. We need to have a much better feel for that astute what's happening in the workplace number of things here to think about. It's all about engagement, and it's all about performance management at the end of the day, so emotion intelligence could be used for career development. It could be used for you if you're a manager for your management development, and it also could be used for the effectiveness of the team. So if you got a negotiating team dealing with things, that is something worth exploring and adding to, there's different scales to it and different degrees to which we can understand the limits off emotion, intelligence and so forth. And that is the degree to which you can spot emotions and other people use emotions in your own way. Your own control yourself, regulation yourself. Motivation. Talked about that briefly on understanding emotions. Now these little sketches, cartoons, and they're supposed to illustrate various emotions, and some are better than others identifying them. So managing your own emotions by responding to the recognized emotion of other people. So can you tell the board enthusiastic, happy or sad from these little pictures? When I think about the tears and the sad on a smile in the happy but the enthusiasm looks embarrassed, blushed cheeks the board Well, I don't know about that on the ones below what you make of those. Well, this is what they are. The angry eyebrows coming in? Yes, crestfallen. Quite sure What's going on? Their whistles just come up mouth sulking. If you've had any teenagers around the house on, then the confused Well, okay, let's not worry about that, because that is a Siris of Khartoum's. But the degree to which we can observe and in our communications program that we run predated law. We have visual elements to see whether you can pick up on facial expressions to spot the emotion behind the expression. So again, quite a powerful tool when you're trying to use those things when it comes to personality traits, well, and a lot of this been explored. I've got good colleagues who have worked with looking at psycho metrics and so forth. But what have you? But there are big five personality traits on these air important for negotiations because there are those that open, open minded we're willing to explore new ideas on that, Therefore, could add value in negotiation was mentioned a moment ago. They're all those very thorough, very conscientious, very analytical measuring everything wanted to get it absolutely right and can be restrained in their thinking in some ways, but nonetheless are very good detail there. All those were just fun loving and extroverted passing around all over the place on Well, she will be in trouble if she damages that mattress. I can tell so you can get the extroverted but the agreeable. Happy to go along with things much more, accepting of new ideas and so forth and tend to be helpful. And there are those who will find themselves very neurotic, very anxious concern that they are getting as much as they should, even when it's quite a good deal. And it's good old Woody Allen, a great comedian, on, uh, an author and director films so different personality traits that summarize very nicely with the word ocean. And we can remember those that are open, conscientious, extroverted, agreeable and neurotic little way of summarizing each of the formats. Now, finally, we need to look at dealing with dirty tricks, and it's not my intention here to go through the detail of 20 or more dirty tricks. We've done that on the long program, but I can summarize a few thoughts here when dealing with dirty tricks. What they really are trying to do here is to gain control of the process of negotiation in order to, in turn get a control off content. So what we mean by dirty tricks is first of all, recognize and what they are and then deal with them appropriately. That's where way have parties apart have to negotiate out of potential conflict, actual conflict to deal with those things. The first thing to do is to separate people from the problem. If you're dealing with somebody, negotiation believe they're telling porky pies. Untruth. Is nobody calling something liar? So you need to separate people from the problem. You say it's something quite realistically. I'd like to just check the source of that information. What do you trust me? It's not about trust, accusing you of anything. I just need to check the source of that particular piece of information. Separate people from the problem. The accuracy of the information on the the validity of a source of it, not the carrier of information is the first step. What's the interest of the other person nor position? The position of buying remains a buyer position. Ceta remains the seller position of defendant remains the same. The position of the claimant remains the same is not the position per se. But it's the interest of the buyer seller for claiming the defender that we need to focus on because positions don't change positions often uses. What is your position on this and that? That really means What is your thoughts on this? What is your approach to this particular issue? So interests of those particular characters involved is so important because once you understand what the interest are, then there's opportunity, a short recess, to come up with ideas that may improve things and add value to the discussion overall, which then allows us to say, when I came to be very objective on the criteria, the facts and the science, the words numbers on those sorts of things that are very objective in terms of timelines, of course, in where in which the conflict could be resolved. So, general view there, If you're dealing with skilled buyers, of course there is a number of things Do you have to be very aware off on that is negotiating the rules of the game is the general view. If you have a problem with the particular approaches taking, then have a look at the longer program goes with 20 or more different tactics. And so first thing is to recognize them on say, Okay, let's take one. For example, good cop, bad cop scenario where something's really helpful. Somebody is not. So I recognize and raised the issue explicitly. Okay, Well, it seems like I can't believe that you'd be playing this good cop bad cop scenario. We've all seen it in the films would be help invited the same or I raised the issue explicitly Question of legitimate, See on the desire ability. Is this what I really want? Is this the way forward does it pass? They reciprocity, test reciprocal nature. It's usually that somebody else wants to use a dirty trick, but it's not OK did the same. And that may often soften the blow. And, of course, his Einstein said after their rules, the game. And then you have to play better than anybody else. Well, I think that works in a number of different areas. So, of course, become very aware off these tactics. Then, if you're very aware of the tactics, there's a number things you can do to deal with those dirty tricks. Now the dirty tricks are not gonna go through here. That's not the intention of a keynote program will be able to explore those in a lot more detail in the longer program. I've got some notes in the workbook with you that will explore some issues in a little bit more detail, particular what I've gone through here in terms of dealing with 30 tricks, we summarize them in three different ways. One is that lead to deceive you. Absolute deception is not saying Lying is just trying to be deceptive. There are all those that make you feel uncomfortable psychological warfare, choosing particular times of day making late in the afternoon or whatever it might be to create that. And then, of course, those positional pressure tactics, their refusal to negotiate or locking into a particular way of dealing with things not, of course, in this program intended whatever to be a summary of everything. But I hope it's remaining you of the sort of things that we talked about on. You're inspired to go and find out a little bit more in the longer program. So there we go. Having gone through this course, you can define your negotiation strategy, choosing a political approach appropriate for the situation on If you're in commercial negotiations recognized the different stages of negotiation. Time to negotiate. We've explored briefly emotion, intelligence in negotiation, understanding what it is, how it could be applied personality traits in terms of identifying behaviors in other parties and then being being able to explore how to deal with them on Recognize that there's a number of different ways to deal with conflict. Do with 30 tricks. Well, I hope that's been useful. It has been a great fun to have a canter through the subject area. I've always enjoyed exploring this. It's the human dynamic, which I do find absolutely fascinating. I hope you have to. I do look forward to seeing you again on the next program. As a senior negotiator, I'm sure you will find the communications program from Data Law on the other negotiating ideas that we've got something worth exploring. So thanks for listening on. I've been met. Mukai. Thanks again. See you all next program. Bye. For now